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Life Archives - VICE

Africa Is Breaking Apart Faster Than Scientists Thought. Now What? The Person You Just Started Dating Probably Isn’t Who You Think They Are Why So Many Gen Z Cut Family and Friends Off Without Warning How Birdwatching Changes Your Brain, According to Science Why You Always Feel Like Garbage on Your Birthday (Astrology Has an Answer) 7 Signs You’re Not Dating for Love, You Just Want Validation Men and Women Have Very Different Opinions About the Amount of Sex They’re Having Scientists Finally Know Where Weirdo Comet 3I/ATLAS Came From Stop Romanticizing Your Coworkers: 4 Tips for Getting Over Your Work Crush Why Making Friends as an Adult Is So Hard (and How to Find Your People) There Are More Redheads Than Ever Thanks to an Unexpected Evolutionary Twist Who You Attract vs. Who You Actually Need, Based on Your Zodiac Sign What Each Zodiac Sign Can Expect from the Full Moon in Scorpio Farming for Millennia Has Done Something Strange to Human Noses Archaeologists Just Found Out What Neanderthal Kids Did When They Were Bored The Scientific Reason Some People Literally Hear Colors Scientists Say This Solo Outdoor Habit Can Cure Your Loneliness This Is What You’ll Dream About Right Before You Die Are Men or Women Bigger Gold Diggers? Science Finally Has an Answer. What Your Bond With Your Dog Says About Your Relationships With People Influencers Won’t Stop Harassing Man’s Cows, So He Plans to Make Them Uglier This Common Workout Mistake Could Wreck Your Erections Scientists Uncovered Fossils of a 100-Million-Year-Old ‘Kraken’ We’re Throwing the First Ever Blowout Magazine Launch Party for Bots VICE is Going on Tour: Come Celebrate the Launch of Our New Issue IRL 5 Habits of Couples With Amazing Sex Lives This Is the Best Time of Day to Have Sex British Monkeys Are Doing Something Weird and It’s All Tourists’ Fault Something Strange Is Slowly Spreading Across Mars, and Scientists Don’t Know What It Is Scientists Are Begging People to Stop Entering This Virus-Filled Bat Cave The 5 Most Common Sex Injuries That Send People to the Hospital, According to ER Doctors What Archaeologists Found Hidden Inside a Roman-Era Mummy in Egypt A Surprising Number of Long-Term Couples Admit to Hating Their Partner Your Morning Coffee Is Reshaping Your Gut. 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Some Air Force Cadets Got in Trouble for Drawing Penises in the Sky
Luis Prada · 2026-04-24 · via Life Archives - VICE

It is every pilot’s duty, at some point in their career, to safely and securely—without putting anyone at risk—use flight tracking systems to draw some penises in the sky. Not with skywriting smoke. That would be gauche. But with GPS tracking. It feels like a rite of passage. Unfortunately, it’s a lot less acceptable when you’re a professional pilot or a military pilot, which is exactly the problem facing a group of cadets from the Finnish Air Force.

During a training exercise on April 13, cadets flying out of Tikkakoski used their flight paths to create shapes that, according to publicly available tracking data from Flightradar24, resembled d—k and balls. At least four aircraft were involved, each contributing a piece to the beautiful tapestry.

The flights themselves weren’t technically unsafe, but Air Force officials would rather their very expensive equipment weren’t used to draw genitalia via GPS.

Finnish Air Force Cadets Reportedly Drew Dicks During Training Flight

The Air Force confirmed that the cadets were disciplined, emphasizing that military personnel are expected to follow standards of conduct that extend beyond just not crashing planes. Drawing a mighty penis among the clouds, anchored by a proud set of sky testicles, does not fall under that standard, apparently.

One thing to keep in mind here is that the story was initially reported by Iltalehti, a Finnish tabloid outlet. From what I’ve gathered, it doesn’t exclusively dish out bulls—t stories, but it does operate closer to the sensational end of journalism. So while the core facts have been acknowledged by the Air Force, it’s worth keeping that context in mind.

Regardless, the lesson to take from this is that we should all try to leave a mark on life in the little time we have on this planet. Will yours be a gargantuan penis in the sky, or will it be something stupid?