Large language model (LLM) alignment via reinforcement learning from human preferences (RLHF) suffers from unstable policy updates, ambiguous gradient directions, poor interpretability, and high gradient variance in mainstream pairwise preference learning paradigms. To systematically address these limitations, we establish a unified theoretical framework for preference-based RL optimization centered on the Pair-GRPO family, comprising two tightly coupled variants: Soft-Pair-GRPO and Hard-Pair-GRPO. Soft-Pair-GRPO is a minimal modification of Group Relative Policy Optimization (GRPO) that replaces group-normalized scalar rewards with binary pairwise preference rewards, retaining GRPO's clipped surrogate and KL-regularized structure. We prove a critical gradient equivalence theorem: under first-order Taylor expansion around the current policy, Soft-Pair-GRPO's gradient is a positive scalar multiple of standard GRPO's gradient, explaining its empirical stability despite discarding continuous reward magnitudes. Building on this foundation, we propose Hard-Pair-GRPO, an advanced variant introducing explicit local probability constraints and constrained KL-fitting optimization to further suppress gradient noise and global policy drift. We provide comprehensive theoretical guarantees for both variants--including monotonic policy improvement, deterministic gradient direction, gradient-variance reduction, and dynamic step-size convergence. Extensive experiments on standard LLM alignment benchmarks (HH-RLHF,UltraFeedback) and the MuJoCo continuous control task HalfCheetah-v4 demonstrate that our Pair-GRPO family consistently outperforms state-of-the-art baselines in alignment quality, human preference win rate, training stability, and generalization to general reinforcement learning. Ablation studies validate the critical contributions of each core component.