Made for mugs. Built for tables.
Designed to lift, insulate, and grip in all the right ways. Oryzo makes the simplest moment feel considered.
The world's most unnecessarily sophisticated cork coaster.
PLAY
Oryzo isn’t just a coaster. It’s the result of unprecedented AI* breakthroughs.
AI fills in the gaps. We said high five. It heard six.
This stunt was performed by professionals.
Do not attempt this at home.
Hey @oryzo, can you put on a bikini?
ISSUE NO. 00124
AI SLOP IDEAS
FOR THIS
WINTER
We Are So
Cooked!
Oryzo is taking everyone's jobs...and replacing them with AI!
ORYZO-1
An open-weight model designed to belightweight and easy to carry.
With a precision-engineered lift (exactly one coaster thick), Oryzo doesn’t just hold your mug - it elevates it. Literally. Above every boring surface you’ve ever known.
Handles Extremes with Ease
From piping-hot mugs to ice-cold drinks - Oryzo stays perfectly stable. Your coffee table already tapped out three sips ago.
Perfectly Round, Seriously
Our engineers recalibrated its circumference with disturbing levels of attention to detail - just because we could.
Creative
T = 10
Balanced
T = 1
Deterministic
T = 0.1
Friction coefficient (est):
0.80
100% Plant-based
Pure cork sourced sustainably.
Completely vegan - no cows were harmed,
but it might be full of "bull"sh*t.
Cork oaks are typically first harvested at around 25 years, once the bark is thick enough to remove safely.
25
After each harvest, the bark takes about 9 years to regrow, making cork a renewable material.
No compute. No tokens. So you can say “please” and “thank you” as much as you want, guilt free.
Do not take our word for it, see what people say after living with Oryzo.
"This is the best coaster that I've
ever used. I can't go to the space
without it"
"My coaster? If you want it, I'll let you have it. Look for it! I left everything I gathered together in one place!"
Gol D. Roger
Old-school Pirate
"We are so cooked. Hollywood is not ready for a coaster this cinematic."
Jamie R.
AI influencer, Ex-Web3 influencer
"I tried the wearable mode. I achieved… attention."
"My table hasn't been this protected since I stopped trusting gravity."
Priya K.
Flat Earth believer
The original. Refined until it feels inevitable. Lifts just enough, grips just right, and quietly disappears into your day like it was never there.
A little more presence. Double the cork, double the confidence - without losing the plot.
Maximum stack for maximum unnecessary satisfaction. A bold little pedestal for your mug and a quiet flex for the whole desk.
NewORYZO | NewORYZO Pro | NewORYZO Pro Max |
|---|---|---|
| One coaster. One job. Done beautifully. | Twice the cork. Twice the commitment. Still effortless. | Three layers of confidence. For people who like their coffee slightly above it all. |
Stack: 1 | Stack: 2 | Stack: 3 |
Lift: 1 coaster thick | Lift: 2 coasters thick | Lift: 3 coasters thick |
Material: Cork | Material: Cork | Material: Cork |
Connectivity: None | Connectivity: None | Connectivity: None |
Pairing: Not Required | Pairing: Not Required | Pairing: Not Required |
Updates: Never | Updates: Never | Updates: Never |
Best for: Daily mugs and quiet desks | Best for: Taller cups and extra stability | Best for: Maximum lift and maximum presence |
We present Oryzo-1, an open-weight 3D model of a cork coaster for rendering, simulation, and gloriously unnecessary research. Oryzo-1 faithfully reproduces key coaster behaviors - table protection, perfect circularity, and passive thermal moderation under everyday beverage conditions. Released in clean OBJ format with baseline results on our own WoodenBench (a standardized evaluation suite conducted on a single desk and very possibly rigged by us). Limitations include heavy dependency on gravity, mugs, and human deployment.
This website was single-shot espresso’d into existence by the creative team at Lusion.
"Oryzo-1 A0B is the best model out there. Trust me bro."
- Anonymous LocalLLaMA Reddit user
@misc{oryzo2026,
title = {Oryzo-1: Open-Weight Coaster Model},
author = {Lusion},
year = {2026},
howpublished = {OBJ release},
note = {A high-fidelity 3D model of a cork coaster. Code: coming soon.
} 此内容由惯性聚合(RSS阅读器)自动聚合整理，仅供阅读参考。 原文来自 — 版权归原作者所有。
Runs on the edge
Refuses the cloud
On-device.
Always On
24/7 UPTIME. No power required.
Runs on RTX 3090
No More OOM on any consumer GPUs
Perfect By Design
Drop-Tested
Test conditions: hard surface DATE: 02/29/2026 Damage: The Floor ;)
Legacy Support
Supporting backward compatibility since the 5th millennium BCE