Semantic segmentation and change detection are two fundamental challenges in remote sensing, requiring models to capture either spatial semantics or temporal differences from satellite imagery. Existing deep learning models often struggle with temporal inconsistencies or in capturing fine-grained spatial structures, require extensive pretraining, and offer limited interpretability - especially in real-world remote sensing scenarios. Recent advances in diffusion models show that Gaussian noise can be systematically leveraged to learn expressive data representations through denoising. Motivated by this, we investigate whether the noise process in diffusion models can be effectively utilized for discriminative tasks. We propose Noise2Map, a unified diffusion-based framework that repurposes the denoising process for fast, end-to-end discriminative learning. Unlike prior work that uses diffusion only for generation or feature extraction, Noise2Map directly predicts semantic or change maps using task-specific noise schedules and timestep conditioning, avoiding the costly sampling procedures of traditional diffusion models. The model is pretrained via self-supervised denoising and fine-tuned with supervision, enabling both interpretability and robustness. Our architecture supports both tasks (SS and CD) through a shared backbone and task-specific noise schedulers. Extensive evaluations on the SpaceNet7, WHU, and xView2 buildings damaged by wildfires datasets demonstrate that Noise2Map ranks on average 1st among seven models on semantic segmentation and 1st on change detection by a cross-dataset rank metric (average F1 primary, IoU tie-break). Ablation studies highlight the robustness of our model against different training noise schedulers and timestep control in the diffusion process, as well as the ability of the model to perform multi-task learning.