Kinky sex is subjective. Your feeder kink might just need TikTok’s WingStop ASMR to get off, or maybe you need something more intense, like taking two at a time. Whatever floats your boat. There is one non-negotiable, though: lubricant.
Lube has been everywhere recently. UK icon Peaches’ released a new album titled, “No Lube, So Rude” with a limited-edition lube that’s tiny enough to take on-the-go. Elsewhere, viral movie Pillion followed actor Alexander Skarsgård as he learned how to bootlick and use lube. As resident sex expert for pjur lube, Tim Lagman shared, “Media can be a powerful tool when it comes to sex education and representation.” Peaches covered in lube on her album cover?
Genius.
Why? Well, most people treat lube like a sex accessory when it’s really your sous chef — aka right hand. We all know about condoms and consent being sex essentials, but lubricant is what allows the slip and slide that makes for good sex. For example, your partner’s having a hard time keeping your clit sucker on point, or you’re feeling a bit dry after trying the third sex toy of the session. Your wet friend is made for moments like these.
“If you’re packing condoms and dental dams in your sex kit, you might as well pack a bottle of lube,” Lagman continued. “Apply more than you think you need, and apply generously. More lube is always a good idea, and less painful friction will make for a smoother experience.” For example, a day of marathon anal calls for pjur Backdoor Silicone lube, Lagman recommended.
The type of lube you use is based on the style of fun you plan on having. Fucking in water? Silicone-based lube. Silicone-based lubes are longer-lasting and typically a go-to for that very reason. Amazing for anal. Slight issue: it takes a lot to clean up after pleasure and it will break down your silicone sex toys.
Water-based lubes are lightweight and tend to dry faster meaning that you’ll have to reapply during sex. The cleanup is easier, though.
Good ole’ coconut oil will always do the trick. But, it’ll break condoms, too. Your safest bet if you’re wearing condoms and using toys is silicone-based lubricants. Just prepare to throw those sheets in the wash afterwards.
We also looped in Langman for his expert anal lube suggestion (pjur Backdoor) and tried a few like Überlube, maude’s heat, Dressing for Pleasure’s latex lube, pjur’s entire line, and Date Night by Playground. The rest were selected from the internet’s best reviews and specs.
Read on for the best lubes for sex (especially, anal), latex BDSM and more…
Kush Queen’s THC lubricant is cannabis infused, like a blunt, but for taking the edge off in the bedroom. It’s transdermal, meaning 5-6 pumps of this will quickly absorb into your skin giving you sex and skin benefits. Think: deeply relaxed muscles, sensational tingles, reduced inflammation (no BS), and the precursor to that stoner cigarette after sex. Remember when we said lube was essential? Yeah. Oh, and with its anti-inflammatory properties, it’ll help soothe any friction or rashes from when you didn’t use lube.
An overlooked benefit of THC lube is that it helps women get very wet. (Given the state of the world, that’s rather essential). Also good cop if you love marathon sex as it increases sensitivity, and reduces pain (for our BDSM and rough sex lovers). And no, you won’t fail a drug test if you use this… allegedly.
So, you want to take a pounding. This is made for that. As sex expert Lagman shared above, “The natural jojoba of this lube makes it very hydrating,” so you don’t leave a kinky sesh with irritated skin or micro tears that make shitting hell. pjur’s staple is thicker than most for a proper slip and slide, and of course, decrease the need for stopping sex to get more lube. Its also made hypoallergenic (yes, you read that correctly), so it leaves your genitals feeling soft after sex — even if you tend to be super sensitive. You can also use it to massage your lover before sex.
Sexual wellness brand maude is known for everything discreet. This lube, however, is anything but. It turns up the heat with a low dosage special ingredient: pepper extract aka capsaicin. Think of this as an arousal serum in lube form.
Compared to other heating lubes, maude’s ingredients are cleaner, but don’t hit all at once exuding that burning feeling some hate. Not too much, just enough. You’ll gradually feel the heat turn up with this water-based lube that stimulates blood flow and makes temperature play easier to achieve.
Perfect for BDSM favorites like edging, power play, sensation play, and external pleasure. Because its water-based, heat is compatible with your latex condoms, polyisoprene condoms (non-latex options like SKYN condoms), and silicone sex toys. Think of this as an arousal serum in lube form.
Christina Aguilera surprised all of us when she dropped a lube line. After trying Playground’s full line, we can attest that this is good AF. It has a luxe feel with major slip. Plan on getting rowdy? Playground’s Date Night is a champagne and vanilla hydrating lubricant that’s more fit for foreplay and sex toy use.
Use this if you need help easing into sexy time or if you desire a sensory boost through subtle scents and sensitivity. Another helpful use is for clit sex toy lovers. If you or your lover struggle to find the perfect placement on your clit, use a little lube to slide it into the right spot.
Skip this for things like rough penetration, though. Date night helps make you more sensitive and keeps skin top-tier with special ingredients like vitamin E, hyaluronic acid, and bamboo extract. Try this during massages (it has such a seductive scent), oral, fingering, and anything else that helps you get in the mood. We don’t typically suggest scented lubes but this adds a sexy aroma that’s worth it.
Smooth, silky, and never sticky. Überlube’s signature uses Vitamin E to keep your skin hydrated and friction-free. The bottle also uses special tech that makes sure you get the perfect sized pump of lube in your hand each time. Unlike others, this doesn’t absorb into the skin. So, instead of your skin sucking up all the good stuff, Überlube stay where it’s supposed to.
Kinksters that plan on fucking for hours, or having rough sex, no need to scroll further. This has been ranked the best of the best for decades with good reason. It’s reliable, has no toxic ingredients like alcohol, fragrance, or parabens, that affect your pH and unrelated, but the packaging is sleek AF and I’d keep it on my nightstand.
Are fashion and aesthetics your fetish? A luxury take on the bedroom staple, this one’s for fetish enthusiasts who’s outfits are part of the pleasure. Legendary latex designer for celebs like Beyoncé and Lady Gaga, Atsuko Kudo, created this with two uses: to get you off, and to help you slide your skin-tight latex on and off. The goal is to keep you confident in your couture, and comfortable in the kinkiest moments.
It’s sensual design allows you to take this with you on travel to any clients that require a little.. polishing. Speaking of clients, incorporate this into your BDSM play scenes by adding it slowly to exude seduction, or tap into power play to make them beg for more (lube, that is).
The thicker the lube, the better. LubeLife is clearly tapped in. If you’re into orgies, dragon dildos, or anything that requires taking… a lot, LubeLife’s 3x Anal Lube is about as helpful as a lubricant can get. Not sticky, or slippery, instead it grips. Yes, grips, because although engineering lube for slip is great, sometimes you need to make sure you’re taking and keeping it all in. This makes it the best match for all things rough and animalistic.
With its thick consistency, you won’t have to kill the vibe mid-stroke for more lube. It stays put. That also means no leaking lube which unfortunately can make you “paint” or leave a little behind when you didn’t mean to.
Whether you’re kinky or vanilla, you need lube—but especially if you’re out here having rough or anal sex. A good lube can run you $30 to $50. However, there are still great options on the lower side (under $10); you’ll just have to pause sex often to grab lube and somehow make it sexy.
Clean girls should keep it simple and use Überlube’s signature bottle. Wanting to spice things up a bit, and still be mindful of ingredients: maude’s heat will literally turn up the heat. If you’re trying anal or any rough sex, your best options are pjur’s Backdoor and LubeLife’s 3x lube.
And most importantly, use protection, ask for consent, and don’t use silicone lube with condoms or sex toys.
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