Online link recommendation on evolving graphs is performative: by choosing which candidate links to show users, the system changes which links form and what feedback it later observes. Consequently, fairness estimates from logged outcomes can be misleading and may drift after deployment when the recommendation policy is updated. We introduce COPF (Counterfactual Online Performative Fairness), a decision-layer framework for deployment-stable fairness monitoring and control in online link recommendation. COPF (i) defines group-level opportunity gaps over exposure (shown vs. not shown) counterfactuals, (ii) makes them estimable by explicit exploration and by logging the probability (propensity) that each candidate is shown, and (iii) audits and controls fairness using residual outcome indistinguishability (OI) over a configurable auditor family with graph-aware doubly robust (GA-DR) estimators. We provide a noisy transfer theorem showing that Residual-OI on estimated GA-DR residuals implies bounds on exposure-counterfactual group gaps under temporal mixing and bounded local interference, and we instantiate an online multicalibration auditor together with a primal-dual controller. Experiments on two TGB streams and a controlled synthetic bipartite stream show that COPF reduces worst-case spikes in exposure-counterfactual group disparities with modest impact on ranking utility. Our code is available at https://github.com/lsnnnnnnnn/COPF.