i recently learned that, in february, jack dorsey – formerly of twitter, now of block – wrote a 600-word email announcing a mass layoff (4,000 employees) all in, you guessed it, lowercase.

This was the jumping-off point for an investigation into the tech broligarchy’s “new language of power” by journalist Zak Jason for Business Insider. Jason conducted his own no-caps experiment, recklessly deploying lowercase in messages to his boss, colleagues, fellow parents and “every outreach to sources for this story – biz etiquette experts, comms gurus, & sam altman”. He agonised less and responded quicker, he concluded, but lost clarity.

Lowercase has its place (Instagram stories about my hens, for example), but it’s hard to imagine adopting it in work communications. Risking being perceived as ultra laid-back, even sloppy, seems like the kind of privilege only those in unassailable positions of power can really enjoy. Isn’t it, also, a little affected? Having laboriously uncapitalised all the autocorrected capitals in that first sentence, I’d argue lowercase gives an illusion of casual thoughtlessness, while actually being quite deliberate. A lowercase “i” presents as low-ego humility, but the real message is that you can afford not to care what your message recipients think of you.

It’s not my most hated email habit though – that’s “tks” as an email signoff. Really? Your time is too precious for three more letters? The French equivalent, “bàv” (an abbreviated “bien à vous”, yours), is even worse, because when you read “bàv”, it sounds like bave, or drool. From the language that used to implore us to accept its distinguished greetings to end a letter, that seems deeply undignified. Worst of all is replying with only a thumb emoji. Those get another digit directed at my screen.

There’s a not-insignificant risk of sounding like Jacob Rees-Mogg when you start to deplore the decline of written civilisation. I’m not that uptight – I find typos and autocorrect errors endearing (especially from one beloved correspondent whose WhatsApps are as impenetrable as the Voynich manuscript). And I suppose laconic lowercase messaging has one big advantage: it suggests you didn’t entirely outsource the tedious business of communicating with other human beings to AI.