Starbucks has innovated the perfect tool for getting mid-coffee in our misanthropic age. Those too cowardly to look their barista in the eyes before deciding not to give them a tip no longer have to simply hide behind an official Starbucks app. Now, they can place their order through ChatGPT, OpenAI’s notoriously sycophantic AI chatbot.

In practice, the concept — an in-AI app, rather than an in-app AI — is as braindead as it sounds, and has elicited heaps of complaints and bemused responses on social media. Wes Bos, a software developer, observed on X that it was “one of the first MCP apps I’ve seen break outside the tech circle,” noting that it was “very interesting that the public’s reaction is poor as this is supposed to be the future of UI.” (MCP refers to model context protocols, an open source standard for plugging external tools into large language models.)

This particular “future” is likely to drive you as nuts as an over-elaborate order with thirteen different syrups does a Starbucks employee. Imagine every time you’ve had to shout back and forth with a barista in a packed location to nail down your order. Almond milk, please, and does this seasonal cold foam or whatever have dairy? Is venti or grande the large one? The experience is kind of like that, only you’re conversing with a chatbot that takes an irritating several moments to load before responding, making the exchange even more stilted.

In other words, it’s hugely inefficient. A veteran Starbucks addict can place their favorite order through the app with their eyes closed in a matter of seconds. With ChatGPT, the process can take several minutes. Demonstrating that point, one user uploaded videos comparing the experiences. When using the app, all it took was a few taps and swipes and an order of Mango Strawberry Lemonade Energy Refresher was ready to be placed in just under 20 seconds. It took them about a minute-forty to do that in ChatGPT.

“This is why it sucks and AI replacing UI and apps makes no sense,” the user wrote on X.

The experience was even worse for The Verge’s David Pierce, who described it as a “complete mess.” Everything wrong with chatbots was on full display, including persistent glazing. After telling the AI to order a Venti iced coffee, ChatGPT responded: “The Iced Coffee is exactly what you’re after — cold-brewed and served unsweetened, so adding light skim milk will keep it smooth without getting heavy.”

Pierce still had to manually customize the drink by going through a few clunky menus before adding it to the cart, defeating the point of telling your order to an AI in the first place. And that’s when things got downright comical, with a pop-up then warning that the chat was “nearing its limit” as he was in the middle of adding another drink.

“Hitting the limit this fast was a bit surprising,” Pierce wrote. “Also, why is there a limit at all, when I’m trying to do a thing that theoretically makes both ChatGPT and Starbucks a bunch of money?”

Pierce tried to power through the order, but ChatGPT got the Starbucks location wrong. When he tried to fix it, he got an “Oops! Something went wrong,” message, before another pop-up appeared: “You’re out of messages with the most advanced Free model.” The timer would reset in five hours.

Using the downgraded ChatGPT model also proved to be a dead-end: “I can’t place your order directly or add it to a real cart,” the chatbot told Pierce.

And that’s how frustrating the experience is when you know what you want. In its press release, Starbucks promises that the AI can pick you the perfect coffee in response to open-ended prompts like, “Recommend a drink that matches the vibe of my outfit.”

“Over the past year, one thing has become clear: customers aren’t always starting with a menu. They’re starting with a feeling,” marketing copy reads in the release.

The feeling online, at least, is that this integration is really stupid.

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