Google appears to think I'm a much wealthier, sexier man than I really am. Thanks, I guess? That's the impression I got from the company during its 2026 Android Show. Google showed off a variety of new Android 17 features all of which seem firmly aimed toward folks with the same bank balance as its own CEO. 

It really left me thinking, what about the rest of us? 

The Android Show is Google's 30-minute prerecorded show ahead of its big I/O keynote, in which it previews upcoming Android features. This time, the big news was deeper integration with Gemini AI tools, a better Android Auto interface and a build-your-own widget creator, which does things like keeping track of your upcoming flights. 

The common theme to all of these things is money. Lots of money. Money that you already have and money that you're willing to spend.

The Android Auto demo showed how well it fits on BMW's larger screens and how YouTube will play at 60 frames per second on your infotainment system's compatible display. We even got a tragic cameo by Paris Hilton in her luxury Genesis, saying how the car can turn into her own private movie theater. 

I currently drive a 2007 Toyota Auris with 110,000 miles on the clock, a broken CD player, no USB inputs and covered in so much bird crap that I sometimes forget the original color. I make it "smart" by shoving my iPhone into a holder that clips onto the heating vents. My version of in-car Dolby Atmos audio is a portable Bluetooth speaker I recharge and place on the passenger seat because there's no way to connect my phone to the car. 

Later in the Auto demo, we were shown Gemini being used to explain whether a new 65-inch TV would fit in the back of a Volvo EX60. I have to be fair to Google here: I also recently bought a 65-inch telly. But not having a $65,000 (or more) Volvo to pick it up in, I just had to call a friend who owned a van. 

Then there were the multiple examples of using Gemini's new agentic AI tools to book "floor seat" concert tickets, which alone can cost hundreds of dollars, depending on the artist -- or even into four figures if you went to Taylor Swift's Eras Tour.

Not into concerts? Google has you covered with some "relatable" travel options: coffee and chocolate tours in Costa Rica. And no, not just for you, but for a group of six, so that you can go with five of your wealthiest friends. And if that doesn't appeal, Google's other idea is a vintage shopping trip to Tokyo. 

In fact, all of Google's examples involved parting with vast swathes of money in one way or another, whether it's booking flights and restaurants, or buying clothes and concert tickets. It's no surprise, I guess. Google is essentially a search engine that points you toward things you can spend money on. This is what Circle to Search has turned into over the past couple of years. 

But today's Android Show seemed an even bigger salute to rampant capitalism than usual. I couldn't help but feel it had lost track of its audience. 

Purse strings are tightening the world over, and more of us are struggling to afford even basic life essentials, let alone shopping trips to Tokyo or coffee tours in Costa Rica. We don't all drive luxury Genesis cars thanks to our Hilton fortune, nor do we all have over $100,000 of bitcoin in our crypto wallets, as Google's Alexander Kuscher appeared to have during his Googlebook demo. Good for him. But when so many of us have sleepless nights due to worry about paying big bills this kind of display of tone-deaf wealth-bragging left an extremely sour taste in my mouth.

It wasn't just the money angle that irked me. During one demo, Gemini was told to book "front row seats" for a spin class. Front row?! How about "find me a seat in the dark, back corner so nobody has to see my deeply purple, sweating visage as I pathetically attempt to pedal my way out of an early grave"?

What bugged me is that Google seems to assume that I'm fit. That I'm probably sexy. Or at least fit and sexy enough that I want to be right at the front of the class, wiggling my tight, Lycra-clad butt for everyone else to be inspired by. It's the sort of fitness that requires a lot more free time in the day -- and/or money -- than the average working person has. 

It's a lifestyle that aligns with Google's view of the average Android user: that we all meet our friends for a fancy brunch and, while en route, we plan to meet another friend for a fancy dinner using Android Auto in our fancy car. It isn't clear, in Google's ideal world, when you're supposed to find time to go to work or pick up the kids. 

What is clear is that Google assumes a lot of wealth in its audience. I get it: Google is trying to be aspirational. Except it isn't, not really. 

Its point with these demos is how much easier it makes the things it assumes you're already doing. It's not saying, "Hey, if you use Android, maybe you can go shopping in Tokyo." It's saying, "You're definitely already doing all of this, and these tools will simply help you do it quicker." Google is suggesting that this wealthy, sexy, socialite lifestyle is already the one you have and it's targeting its new features right at you. Its attitude is all wrong, and it risks alienating the 99% of people who can't afford the lifestyle it advertises. 

Google's new features are talking squarely at the 1% who find Paris Hilton's depressingly cringe-worthy sparkly car request a relatable life choice rather than what it is: a complete misunderstanding of how real people live their lives.