It is strange that we talk about date- night dressing so much when we know that the most fun nights to outfit-plan are really nights out with friends. Well, not actually strange at all, just the patriarchy doing what it does, I guess, and making it feel as if the world as seen from a man’s point of view – in this case, the view of a frock from the other side of a restaurant table on date night – is automatically the point of view that matters.

In a fashion context, it just makes no sense. I mean, I accept that I’m generalising wildly here. But my own experience, which I would bet is a fairly common one, is that it’s on a night out with friends when I’m going to get maximum appreciation for the fashion content of my outfit. Men (in my opinion) just want you to look… well, nice? Which is fine, but there’s a lot more to style than that. Like I say, I am generalising, and not all dates are boy-girl anyway, but still: for many women, dressing up for friends is one of life’s underappreciated joys.

There’s no pressure, no expectations, and if you want to try something a little experimental, you can go nuts. On a friends night, you can be wildly overdressed for pizza, and your pals appreciate your look for what it is: enthusiasm for their company. Or you can turn up in your work clothes because you came straight from the office, and they won’t give a toss and just be thrilled to see you. You can wear your new leather trousers and know you will get the chance to tell, at great length, the triumphant story of how you tracked them down on Vinted. You can wear totally impractical shoes, and nobody will roll their eyes when it means you have to get a taxi to a bar a quarter of a mile away.

Fashion is a love language in female friendship. It is woven into the fabric of camaraderie between women. There is no place on earth where you will be more generously complimented than in front of the mirrors of the ladies’ loos, after everyone involved has had a few spicy margs. I’m not being sexist– it might well be that the same goes for lads, but I’m not hanging around their bathrooms, so I can’t speak to that. What I can tell you is that chat about clothes is, first and foremost, a delivery mechanism for support and cheerleading, woman to woman. Wear something bold, and you will get admiration for your originality; wear something low-key, and you will be lauded for your subtle good taste. Style is a channel of communication.

But the love language of fashion between women isn’t just about solidarity, it’s also about joy. It’s about outfits that get captured in selfies, that you treasure not because of what you were wearing but because of the good time you had and so these too are knitted into core memories. Nights out with friends, with pals who know your silly side as well as your smart side, who might slag you for wearing Adidas trackpants with everything but would defend to the hilt your right to do so if anyone said a word against it, are the nights that are the most fun to get dressed for. Date night does not have a monopoly on love.