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Life Archives - VICE

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四“无害”之习,或失汝之良伴
Sammi Carame · 2026-05-24 · via Life Archives - VICE

世人安于久处之谊,多渐怠其侣。或堕于常轨,忘言其慕,废时于所爱。或生骄惰,目流他顾,甚或化情谊为竞逐之场。

若不慎之,看似无害之习,实则可旋踵成情谊之倾颓。 

"毁人伦之习,常为吾辈所视为非患者,"布莉·泰勒言。彼为首席配对师兼首席商业官(CCO)。Tawkify(Tawkify) 大抵情谊之破,常因微末之忽,积少成多,非必一夕之变。

今列四“无害”之习,实可倾覆情谊。

一、心不在焉

悲夫,伉俪之间,怠惰常在。试自问之:虽未必有“非”,然尔之於情,可有裨益乎?

譬如,但若不临人前,则情意遂隔矣。

“心为外物所扰,情意不专,共度时光而心不在焉,默然无视其言,终致情疏意远。时日既久,纵处咫尺,亦令伴侣觉己之微不足道,形影相吊。”此乃Temple之言也.

2. 记分之法

与人较劲,积习易成,尤以自感身心重负为甚。然此道实伤情谊,使两人相争。

“使人恒思孰为彼者利多,孰先言歉,孰弃之先,等,”泰姆尔言。“由是,情谊化为争强斗胜之场,恩爱转成交易而非扶持。”

3. 微欺

世人多不自知,竟已“微出轨”于伴侣,及至悔之晚矣。此非可量之不忠,然或隐秘之通讯,或失当之社交媒体互动,乃至游移之目。积久,必损信任,危及情谊。

吾闻一弊习甚巨,乃世人所从于Instagram,及其评论/点赞之事也。斯蒂芬妮·弗雷塔格博士云:“无论为旧情、同僚倾慕,抑或网红,吾观此等交往,常引妒意,间或致诘以‘出轨’。”

4. 不复示情

视伴若常,失之易矣。久处情谊,或以为伴已知己之爱,悦其貌,感其劳。然若不达此意于伴,则伴或感见弃于怀,遭冷遇焉。

“誉之缺,戏谑之乏,好奇之泯,致情谊为机械之常,无丝毫之进焉,”泰穆之言也。