Credit to Sue Ko who taught me this many years ago.

Gratitude circles are a beautiful way to get team members feel seen by their peers. I run them in-person at least once a year with each of my teams. Quote from one of my engineers after their first gratitude circles:

“I didn’t think I would enjoy this, but I got moved to tears by what my peers wrote about me. Thank you for facilitating this, I have never felt this seen.”

Here’s how to run them:

• Everybody writes at least one note of gratitude on a small piece of paper for each person in the circle. Fold it once and write the name of the person it’s for on the outside.

• Once done, all the notes go into one big bowl. First person picks a note and reads it to the person that it’s for. Then, that person gets the bowl and picks the next note, until there are no notes left.

• That means these notes will be read anonymously!

Most important: how to introduce gratitude circles so you get good results:

• Explain how they’re going to run

• Give them the templates: “I admire about you…” “I appreciate about you…”, “I am grateful for you…”

• Tell them to have substance: the more substance and weight, the better it will land. “I’m grateful to have you as my manager” meh 😐 “I’m grateful how you balance taking care of me as a human with pushing me to grow and get better. I’ve never had a manager strike that balance as well as you do.” 🥹

• Give a good example. E.g., one from a gratitude circle that was phrased for me: “Max, I have so much appreciation for how you balance fun, personal care, and a commitment to our humanity with a drive for excellence and a vision for winning as a company. You lead in a way that I am proud to follow.”