We give and study a construction of pre-Lie algebra structures on rooted trees whose edges and vertices are decorated, with a grafting product acting, through a map $φ$, both on the decoration of the created edge and on the vertex that holds the grafting. We show that this construction gives a pre-Lie algebra if, and only if, the map $φ$ satisfies a commutation relation, called tree-compatibility. We show how to extend this pre-Lie algebra structure to a post-Lie one by a semi-direct extension with another post-Lie algebra. We also define several constructions to obtain tree-compatible maps, and give examples, including a description of all tree-admissible maps when the space of decorations of the vertices is $2$-dimensional and the space of decorations of the edges is finite-dimensional. A particular example of such a construction is used by Bruned, Hairer and Zambotti for the study of stochastic partial differential equations: when no noise is involved, we show that the underlying tree-compatible map is the exponential of a simpler one and deduce an explicit isomorphism with a classical pre-Lie algebra of rooted trees; when a noise is involved, we obtain the underlying tree-compatible map as a direct sum. We also obtain with our formalism the post-Lie algebras described by Bruned and Katsetsiadis.