Sparse longitudinal (SL) textual data arises when individuals generate text repeatedly over time (e.g., customer reviews, occasional social media posts, electronic medical records across visits), but the frequency and timing of observations vary across individuals. These complex textual data sets have immense potential to inform future policy and targeted recommendations. However, because SL text data lack dedicated methods and are noisy, heterogeneous, and prone to anomalies, detecting and inferring key patterns is challenging. We introduce LLmFPCA-detect, a flexible framework that pairs LLM-based text embeddings with functional data analysis to detect clusters and infer anomalies in large SL text datasets. First, LLmFPCA-detect embeds each piece of text into an application-specific numeric space using LLM prompts. Sparse multivariate functional principal component analysis (mFPCA) conducted in the numeric space forms the workhorse to recover primary population characteristics, and produces subject-level scores which, together with baseline static covariates, facilitate data segmentation, unsupervised anomaly detection and inference, and enable other downstream tasks. In particular, we leverage LLMs to perform dynamic keyword profiling guided by the data segments and anomalies discovered by LLmFPCA-detect, and we show that cluster-specific functional PC scores from LLmFPCA-detect, used as features in existing pipelines, help boost prediction performance. We support the stability of LLmFPCA-detect with experiments and evaluate it on two different applications using public datasets, Amazon customer-review trajectories, and Wikipedia talk-page comment streams, demonstrating utility across domains and outperforming state-of-the-art baselines.