1. Gay for pay

by Mike Solana

In yet another piece of unbelievable reporting on the state of California from Chris Rufo, news-weary Americans discover the government is “pressuring public utilities to award $633 million in special contracts to ‘LGBT-owned’ firms.”

But Solana, how could the government possibly know a man is gay? Why, couldn’t some clever Somalian fraudster simply say he enjoyed the intimate company of men and steal the cash?

Well, we’re all in luck. To qualify for the money, Gavin Newsom’s team of experts is making sure residents undergo a “gay-certification program,” and if it turns out that clever Somalian lied about his sexuality he faces up to a year in jail (though, sadly, not deportation).

That’s right, folks, it is a truly auspicious day, as the government has finally discovered a kind of fraud it is actually interested in ending. In the Golden State, if you say you’re gay for money? You’d sure better start proving it.

2. Wtf I hate globalization now

by Riley Nork

As Hollywood continues to grapple with a decline in film production, with studios increasingly shooting overseas where costs are lower than LA’s pricey, red-tape-stricken lots, many in the industry are sounding the alarm: Is La La Land becoming the next Detroit? 

Mike Miller, vice president of the IATSE entertainment union, grew up in globalization-stricken Cleveland and sees the similarities. “This is identical in many ways,” Miller told Vanity Fair recently of entertainment jobs moving abroad, calling it “an undeclared trade war.”

Hmm. Interesting coming from a union boss, considering labor costs are a major reason filming in LA has become so expensive.

But also… all this protectionist “trade war” talk sure sounds a lot like a certain president! Y’know, the one who’s been bashed at the past 11 consecutive Oscars? Anyway, look on the bright side, Hollywood: If every movie gets outsourced to Vietnam, just think about what it will mean for “diversity in film.”

3. Stop the LARP

by Ryan Hassan

I’ve spent the past few days in Detroit for Reindustrialize, a conference for people building America’s industrial future.

The crowd isn’t stodgy like Washington’s, nor as autistic as San Francisco’s — they’re real people you can grab a beer with without wanting to hang yourself.

And Detroit is the perfect setting: one of America’s fallen angels, a city hollowed out by vacuous elites and their fetish for globalization. But will we actually save Detroit?

When Reindustrialize began in 2024, America was blackpilled on building. Now, “reindustrialization” is a meme and VCs talk about reviving the heartland to signal they’re based from their perch in Pacific Heights — but if you want to rebuild Detroit, you can’t keep the gloves on.

Reindustrialization is hard, it takes decades, and we can’t do it with tweets. Build something real before this rare moment passes, because (especially if we get President AOC in 2028…) we may never have another chance.

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