Supporters pictured at 'Sheridan's Big Night Out', held in honour of Sheridan Apter, who died in September 2025. Her father John, pictured fourth from the left, hopes Australia can have more candid conversations about the significance of organ donation. His family said yes to organ donation, but a two-hour rule stopped a life-saving gift. Picture supplied
The confined walls of a hospital's intensive care unit offer little comfort when you are watching your daughter fade away. For John Apter, a father from Lugarno, September 2025 brought the kind of grief that rearranges a family's world forever.
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His 35-year-old daughter, Sheridan, who lived for netball, coaching, and mentoring young girls in St George and Sutherland Shire, had suffered an episode where oxygen was cut off to her brain. The damage was severe and irreversible. After eight days in the intensive care unit (ICU), the decision was made to remove life support.
Amid the impending heartbreak, a beacon of purpose appeared. On the sixth day, hospital staff raised the possibility of organ donation. For the Apter family, it wasn't a difficult choice. They knew Sheridan's generous spirit. "We knew she would have readily agreed to give someone else a second chance at life," Mr Apter said.
The family soon discovered that the distance between the willingness to give and the medical reality of donation is fraught with tight margins. The clock was the enemy. Recipients had to be matched, surgical teams assembled on standby, and, most crucially, Sheridan's heart had to stop beating within two hours of life support being withdrawn. If it took any longer, her organs would begin to deteriorate, rendering them unsuitable for transplant.
Everything was set. But as the family sat by her bedside after the tubes were removed, the minutes ticked away. Just over an hour into the process, the doctor delivered the news that the two-hour window would not be met. Sheridan died just under four hours after life support was removed, her organs intact but unable to be used.
Sheridan Apter was a talented netball player. Picture Confident Girls Foundation
The frustration of that moment still lingers for Mr Apter, even as he holds great admiration for the medical team who tried so hard to make it happen.
"We knew Sheridan wasn't coming home," he said, but he found himself wishing for a different medical framework, perhaps a pathway akin to voluntary assisted dying for families in their exact circumstance, ensuring a legacy of life isn't lost to a strict timeline. He believes it is a conversation Australia needs to have publicly so that fewer organs are wasted when families are desperate to donate.
National DonateLife data reveals that while close to eight million people are registered on the Australian Organ Donor Register, this represents a 35 per cent of the eligible population aged 16 and over. When tragedy strikes in a hospital, whether a family knows their loved one's wishes changes everything. About eight in 10 families consent to donation if their family member is registered, but that figure plummets to just four in 10 if the person's wishes are unknown.
In 2025, the generosity of 557 deceased organ donors allowed 1438 Australians to receive life-saving transplants - a record high. For the Apters, the system could not fulfill their dream of hearing Sheridan's heart beat in another person's chest, but her legacy was not entirely lost. She was able to help two people regain their sight through cornea transplants, part of the 2757 corneal transplants performed across the country last year.
Sheridan Apter, pictured on the left, coached netball teams across several seasons at Connells Point. Picture Facebook
Sheridan's community has ensured her passion for life continues to ripple forward. A dedicated netball lover who spent her life empowering others on the court, her family found solace in the Confident Girls Foundation, an organisation using netball to support disadvantaged women and girls. In March, a fundraiser dubbed 'Sheridan's Big Night Out' raised $40,000 for the Marie Little Shield, a national tournament celebrating inclusion for female athletes with intellectual disabilities.
As DonateLife Week approaches on July 26, Mr Apter hopes his daughter's story prompts more than just a signature on a donor registry. He hopes it sparks a more candid discussion about the complexities, limitations, and the untapped possibilities of organ donation.
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