NAUGHTY BHOYS

An occasionally contrary but invariably entertaining studio regular on Jim White’s TalkSport show before and between stints at Celtic this season, Martin O’Neill made himself available this morning to discuss his side’s dramatic weekend title heist. It’s not often a game of fitba completely overshadows the FA Cup final but Saturday’s denouement at Celtic Park was the rare exception. O’Neill could scarcely have been more complimentary about his players, his staff and the unprecedented levels of global interest generated in the Scottish Premiership by a completely unexpected Hearts title challenge that came up agonisingly short. For 12 minutes O’Neill traded good-natured barbs with White and Sidekick Simon Jordan while joking about “the two Japanese lads” in the dressing-room openly wondering “who is this old man?” on his first day in interim charge. It was only when the trumpeting of the giant elephant in the studio klaxon reached an ear-splitting crescendo that White asked his special guest about the pitch invasion that greeted Celtic’s third goal and whether it suggested “a lack of class” on Celtic’s part.

“I totally disagree with that,” bristled O’Neill, who had perhaps been entertaining the forlorn hope the subject might not be raised. “I don’t know about the confrontations in terms of the Hearts players, let’s find out the real picture. The fact is that when we scored the third goal, the game was essentially over. The referee has claimed he has blown the final whistle and then there’s obvious excitement. It’s a home game and we’ve just won the league and the fans have come on to the field.” Evidence that the final whistle was actually blown is as scarce as proof of claims that several Hearts players were physically assaulted before quickly being escorted from the field. It is also worth noting that O’Neill’s apparent, possibly feigned indifference to the over-exuberance of several hundred fans who took great glee in goading their vanquished visitors was not shared by the vast majority of those present at Celtic Park, who made their displeasure clear.

Denied the chance to thank the travelling Jambos, Derek McInnes and his players instead hightailed it to their team coach and made good their escape back to Edinburgh, with several arriving back at Tynecastle looking genuinely heartbroken and still dressed in full kit. The only thing that might have made them more miserable was discovering that referee Don Robertson definitively hadn’t blown for full-time and they were being ordered to get back on the bus for the 43-mile journey to play the last remaining seconds before being provoked to within an inch of their lives again.

“I think the team’s played with a real attitude to win this season, which really has been demonstrated so often and that pleases me no end,” parped vanquished McInnes on Sunday, after receiving the Scottish Fitba Writers’ Association gong for manager of the year. “We have to be that and a wee bit more again if we can go and try and lift silverware.” For Hearts, a whiteknuckle ride of a season is over, while Celtic still have a Scottish Cup final and the perfect hat-trick of high-profile pitch invasions – their own ground, Ibrox and Hampden Park – to complete.

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QUOTE OF THE DAY

Gone. Get rid. I’ll tell you why. It’s killing spontaneity in the ground. I’m a season ticket holder at Everton. Killing spontaneity. You can’t celebrate a goal because you think someone somewhere in an industrial unit is going to rule it out. So that’s a bad thing. But No 2, it doesn’t get decisions right. You could put up with it if it then got decisions right, but it doesn’t get the decisions right and it’s not consistent” – Andy Burnham, the Greater Manchester mayor reportedly building a potential bid to become the new prime minister, is asked on the burning issue of the day: the war in Iran, the cost-of-living crisis VAR!

I think Michael Lloyd might be on to something with his suggestion for crowd entertainment during VAR reviews (Friday’s letters). Stadium announcers could play songs that match the (alleged) infraction under consideration - maybe Johnny Cash’s ‘I Walk the Line’ for offside reviews, Timbaland’s ‘Hands in the Air’ for when the ball has been leathered against an outstretched digit from incredibly close quarters, or Justin Bieber’s ‘Hold Me’ for set-piece grappling (if it’s one of those scenarios that has to be replayed 17 times, then some or all alternative tracks with the same title by Wilson Phillips, Santana, Alabama Shakes or Tom Waits could also be played). Finally, for dubious decisions made in added time, in games that have a direct impact on the destination of a league title, there is only one possible track: Prince’s ‘Controversy’” – Paul Taverner.

Can I be one of 1,057 others to suggest that Andy Burnham would be better to sport an Everton shirt sponsored by NEC if he wanted to curry favour with the Labour Party hierarchy” – Chris Richardson (and no others).

If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day winner is … Paul Taverner. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here. 

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