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The Guardian

New Zealand’s North Island braces for Cyclone Vaianu with thousands ordered to evacuate Artemis II splashdown – in pictures Swalwell denies allegations of sexual assault as calls grow for him to withdraw from California governor race Trump news at a glance: Epstein survivors have words for Melania Trump after surprise statement Multiple people face charges, including murder, in California fireworks blast Rory McIlroy surges into six-shot Masters lead with stunning second-round flourish Roberto De Zerbi targets ‘Ange-ball’ revival to save Spurs from relegation Bath hit back to reach semi-final after stunning Northampton in 11-try epic Australia crash out of BJK Cup after Britain secure upset with doubles win Zebras, wealth and power: Hungary’s election tests Orbán’s grip on power ‘TikTok effect’ brings sellout crowds and younger fans to Grand National meeting King signs up David Beckham to his Chelsea flower show team The war over Omagh’s gold: the £21bn mine plan tearing a community apart Britain’s shadow workforce is paid as little as 65p an hour. Who cares for the carers? Tim Dowling: my wife is on a quest to restore my thinning hair SUVs are making Britain’s potholes worse, say scientists Blind date: ‘She claimed she was usually shy. I wouldn’t have guessed’ I’m a sauna person now: the Becky Barnicoat cartoon ‘I got everything I dreamed of – when I had no ability to handle it’: Lena Dunham on toxic fame, broken friendships and her ‘lost decade’ Six great reads: the man who let snakes bite him, masked heavy metal and the brutal reality for foreign students in the UK Meera Sodha’s recipe for noodles with rose beancurd, spring greens and egg Cuba’s doctors were a lifeline for the world. Now the Caribbean is shamefully complicit in the US drive to expel them An environmental disaster in Moldova has Russia’s fingerprints all over it ‘This is as important as your teeth’: are you skipping this key part of mouth hygiene? Man arrested after four die trying to cross Channel in small boat Ukraine war briefing: doubts linger in Kyiv over Moscow’s promise to uphold Orthodox Easter ceasefire Ichiro Suzuki statue unveiling goes awry as bronze bat snaps during ceremony Arrest of national war hero Ben Roberts-Smith cuts deeply to core of Australian psyche European football: Real Madrid held at home by Girona to extend winless run ‘You come back different’: how rugby players change after motherhood
Touch Me review – tentacle sex abounds in psychosexual ho...
Catherine Br · 2026-04-28 · via The Guardian

Addison Heimann’s second feature wears its heart – and other appendages – on its sleeve; it is the queer, disaffected millennial live-action hentai psychosexual horror-drama-comedy that a fairly specific slice of the viewing public has been waiting for. It’s mostly about the friendship between Joey (Olivia Taylor Dudley) and Craig (Jordan Gavaris), which from the start is clearly affectionate and a little bit problematic. He pays the rent, she doesn’t; meaning he gets away with shenanigans like asking Joey to stay in her room with the lights out when his Grindr date comes over, because he’s told the guy he lives alone.

Into this dynamic struts Joey’s former lover, Brian (Lou Taylor Pucci), who is more than a little bit problematic himself. He has plenty of charm, choreographed dance routines for days, and is an (almost literal) demon in the sack. In fact, he’s a sometimes-tentacled alien – and he’s also a narcissist. As a character, Brian feels a little modelled on Frank-N-Furter from Rocky Horror, with a hedonistic outlook, pansexual orientation and ear for a toe-tapping tune – though his aesthetic is less fishnets, more Jesus in a hip-hop tracksuit.

Heimann has so much to say about difficult friendship dynamics, difficult relationship dynamics and general millennial malaise that it’s a relief that the tone and pace is mostly light and zippy (though it could probably meander a little less than it does). There are several genuinely hilarious moments once the film kicks into horror mode, as the manipulative, self-pitying and narcissistic alien defends himself in much the same way as a manipulative, self-pitying and narcissistic human might, with the hollowness of his words made gleefully transparent by the horror context. “I’m the real victim in this situation … if I hadn’t fallen for your beauty and elegance,” he whines at one point. The cherry on top of this admittedly weird cocktail is a strong streak of genuine sensuality – if it’s your first encounter with tentacle sex on screen, you might be surprised how appealing Heimann and his cast have managed to make it seem.