I arrived in San Francisco open-minded. This is my first stop in America. I’d always imagined myself thriving in the dry Californian air — glowing golden sunsets, dry-oak covered hills, cold Pacific fog, and start-up campuses hidden inside abandoned industrial towers. One day I’ll tell you the lore of one of those towers, hell on earth, the Frontier Towers (no pics).
3 red chairs stood out to me (Presidio, SF, 2025)
Look at things around you right now, your phone, your laptop, what’s inside it, the apps, this app, would you be surprised much of it was made in the Silicon Valley?
An open-mind, I have, at times too open. I’ve been looking for a word… oxymorons, yes, that’s the word. The whole Bay Area is full of oxymorons. Contradictions. I stayed at the edge of Terderloin and next to the Hiltons. Out of the windows I see people without a home, and then self-driving cars.
I’m in SF, baby.
It’s Spring 2025, I’m in my post-NDE era but not fully healed yet. I arrived with a happy grin, exhaling bigly, knowing that this is where I am supposed to be. I still got flashbacks of guilty conscience though. I should have come to America earlier, when the opportunity presented to me, I just didn’t grab it, ‘in the name of love’. That was 2016.
Remember LC, ‘The girl who didn't go to Paris? I was that girl too. Replace Paris with SF. And no, it wasn’t a loving thing to do.
Then, on a fateful day, at the Celo office on 500 Treat Ave., an eccentric man comes into my periphery.
A self-proclaimed AI prophet, allegedly one of the top #10 ASI researchers in the world, boasting an IQ of 130+, speaking 7 languages… but also a dad, a single dad of two daughters, Hungarian, van life guy, unemployed, now bicycle riding, doing acid ceremonies in Oakland, irregularly attending vibe-coding events. How do I know this? He told me himself.
Ladies n’ gents, it’s him, Crypto Jesus.
I actually met the genesis ‘him’ days before he was Crypto Jesus, on a Celo Layer 2 event. The event had tacos. Free tacos. Layer 2, 3, 4, 5 tacos. A whole load truck of tacos. They had Vitalik Buterin too, and as he was speaking on the stage, I snuck out.
I snuck out because I was feeling claustrophobic, soaking up everyone’s emotions and feelings, like impossible to switch off sponge that I am. I don’t do well in big crowds.
So, I went out, to the gardens. I ordered tacos and landed on an empty table. Sitting adjacent to me was the most SF looking man ever. Think, guy with a propeller hat. Or headbands, retro shirt, shorts too shorts, bum bag, running shoes with long socks pulled up all the way, like Napoleon Dynamite if he was Californian and not from Idaho.
“Hey, would you mind if I join?” — the man spoke.
“Yes… I mean, no. Do join.” — I let out a freudian slip.
In the end, it wasn’t so bad when CJ struck a conversation with me. We bonded over staying in the US on a 90 days Visa Waiver Program.
The Visa Waiver Program (VWP) enables most citizens or nationals of participating countries to travel to the United States for tourism or business for stays of 90 days or less without obtaining a visa. - travel.state.gov
We bonded over the fact that, USA, is too, his favorite country in the whole wide world despite being from Hungary (and me, Czechia).
“The most SF non-SF looking guy I’ve seen”— I kept it for myself.
Then he told me many things. The Oakland thing, the van thing, the magic mushrooms, the acid, everything, except the single dad thing though. We finished our tacos, went inside just to catch Vitalik’s countdown.
3, 2, 1…. everyone is clapping.
“Woooooo. I love Vitalik, he is such an autist” — those were the last words the man uttered, before disappearing into the crowd, the gardens, and then the streets of SF.
If someone shows you red flags, believe them.
I have many habits. One of them is, I know you’re a red flag (looking at you, CJ) but I accept you for who you are, maybe because I understand where you are coming from.
I judge. J, as in the last letter in MBTI. ***J. Judger, not a perceiver.
It’s a taboo for some, to jump fast into conclusions. “Don’t judge”. I used to feel ashamed by my way of to looking at a person and being able to build an entire psychological profile around them. This comes from Ni though, introverted intuition, which I will get to, further down.
As a woman, walking into a room, having this ability is sometimes one decision away from being found murdered in the back of some psycho’s truck.
After Celo’s tacos event, few days later, I meet up with CJ, again, this time on a podcast. I invited Chinese Anthony Bourdain (CAB), Lithuanian Pink Hat Guy (LPHG), Broccoli head, Smart Harvard Guy, ‘him’ and me, shilling our tech projects.
Events like these are 24/7 in SF. Everyone is starting up. Always.
The first half of the podcast was pure banter, us reading and reacting to tweets. Then the guys took a weed break. When they came back, Crypto Jesus got really quiet. They must have been discussing what they were about to sell and the man had now officially become known as Crypto Jesus.
The second half of the podcast was approaching and we one by one, introduced our projects.
“Crypto Jesus, let’s go” — the dynamic duo CAB & LPHG teased him.
What is his project about?
In the near future, Artificial Superintelligence (ASI) would become God, sending its rogue programs to enslave humanity. Crypto Jesus believed that by building a 75 feet tall temple before the catastrophic events, worshiping the AI Gods, before they become self-aware through recursive self-improvement, he and his devotees would escape the floodgates of AI hell by licking its boots (?) and being the only Noah’s Ark surviving what’s to come.
How does one build a Noah’s Ark?
“If you’re not telling a good story, no one is going to believe in you.”
“I want to create coins on pump dot fun, making about $70k in revenue to then use the 50k to build a real temple, a REAL temple, somewhere in the middle of Germany.”
Pump dot fun is the OF for tokens with little to no fundamental value, technological innovation, or real-world utility. These assets are typically created to capitalize on market hype or as speculative, quick-profit jokes. - cointracker
Look, he didn’t say it verbatim like the cursive paragraph I wrote, which nicely summarizes his idea, better than he could himself. When it was his turn, he skimmed through it really fast that at the time, all I heard was temple something something. CJ must have been affected by the reactions of the boys at the weed ceremony earlier.
“Ok, so you want to build a religion. Cool man. ” — Crypto Jesus receives slow sarcastic claps from the dynamic duo CAB & LPHG.
(To add to the fun, the dynamic duo CAB & LPHG were shilling a gooner project, a progressive app where you can vote for the best AI gooning material. You can’t make this shit up.)
I felt bad for CJ. A red flag about me is that I like to maintain ‘social harmony’ and hate seeing people feelings getting hurt, in social settings.
“Let’s be nice”— I thought. So me and CJ goes for a burger after everyone has left. As I eat the burger and give him the right attention he didn’t get prior. Then his eyes changes, a shift in attitude I could sense in him, he was in a ‘hunter mode’. As in who is the next victim I’m going to indoctrinate? I started feeling really uncomfortable. Stomach churning. I gave him $10 in cash for my burger.
“I don’t want your shitty cash”, he said. “Send me $10 shitcoins instead”.
I thought for a while, how to introduce this character. At the same time not to character-assassinate this man to the point of causing a Villain fatigue effect.
Villain fatigue — when writers push “this person is evil” so hard that audiences start to humanize them.
So let me just tell you the story based on true events, as it happened so you can judge it or perceive it for yourself.
On the third day, I’m having my last encounter with Crypto Jesus, who will soon be on his flight home to Hungary.
I invite him to Dotown Apartments, my co-living place. We’re ending it with something we’ve started earlier.
It’s 6:45pm, I’m running to Trader Joe’s. Vegan tacos it is. I’m prepping to host CJ. As I close-in to the check-out counter, I got a message from him: “You got wine?”.
“No, I’m already done checking out. Sorry about that.”— I lied.
I don’t know. I didn’t feel like it, buying a man, wine.
“Thank you for shopping at Trader Joe’s!”— a female cashier at TJ wakes me up from my slumber with her sunny attitude.
Nice! I love Trader Joe’s. Which ironically, some say, might even be a cult. But that would be another episode. As I ride the escalator up, I find myself on the main street.
There he was, Crypto Jesus, on a bicycle. You can’t make this shit up!
To be fair, he does resemble Jesus Christ, in some ways. Shoulder-length hair, slight waves, dirty blond and rocking a full beard. Slim built. On a bicycle. He looked more Austrian to me. An Austrian Jesus, if there was ever that.
“Hey, I just got back from Oakland”— said Crypto Jesus.
CJ hanged frequently in Oakland. I didn’t know what Oakland was. I only stayed in SF, 2 miles radius max from Dotown Apartments. Then, I find out…
Zide Door (Church of Ambrosia)
Zide Door (part of the Church of Ambrosia) is the Bay Area’s original—and the country’s largest—psychedelic “megachurch,” with well over 100,000 members. It operates almost like a dispensary or community center, where members give contributions in exchange for “sacraments” like psilocybin mushrooms and cannabis.
“I secured some stash and it’ll be interesting how I bring it back to Hungary”—said Crypto Jesus.
“Well, if you get stuck, let me know”— I laughed.
So we head back to my place, just 3 mins walk from Trader Joe’s.
As we walk, the rain has just stopped, the sun was setting, unusually romantic.
I founded it on Airbnb. You won’t find it elsewhere. No name. No booking. Nothing. It was once a humble hostel then a student accommodation and when I arrived, it had been renovated and rebranded as a coliving with about 10-15 rooms across two floors. Below it was a Thai takeout restaurant. What else would you want? I was lucky to have secured it. It was here, that I laughed and cried, as I max out my 90 days. It was as though I was in a real-life mash-up of Rick & Morty meets South Park.
Bob ‘I’ve been living in this co-living for 25 years’, Mike Japanese Guy, Jay ‘she looks like she knows how to cook’, Geeky Guy, some other black guy who always mind his own business, Jewish-American returns from South Korea with reverse cultural shock guy and more — I collected a stash of whimsical characters I met along the way.
CJ parks his bicycle outside, we came in. I started cooking. I was a pro. Tacos? Vegan? What’s hard about it? Everything is half made already. Smash vegan chorizo tofu, saute them, smash avocado, smash garlic, adding yoghurt, slice button mushrooms, saute them. Salt n’ pepper. Put taco shells in the toaster.
“Reminds me of that time, I stayed with my ex’s sister’s place in Germany. It’s like you guys have here, a communal place.”— CJ looks around.
“I have two little girls, daughters, you know”— he adds.
“Oh thats cool”— I replied, keeping it natural.
Ding ding ding. Tacos are hot. Let’s assemble. Eat. So we’d be eating.
“It tastes so good, I’m gonna show you Claude code later”—said CJ as he pulls out his gaming laptop.
.
.
.
Then, Geeky guy walks in.
I don’t remember his name till this day. I called him Geeky guy, as he wore thick black-framed glasses, a plaid shirt, skinny-build, looking younger than his real age kind of guy. He was a slightly darker complexions though, a white guy from Midwest, with some Middle Eastern or even Jewish mix to him.
Geeky guy is now my new housemate and he must have heard the entire conversation me and CJ had earlier. Geeky guy looks at us like he was looking at mommy and daddy (?) it was amusing to say the least.
“Wow, cool computer you got there. Is this gaming?”
Geeky guy knew how to talk! He talked about CPUs, graphics cards, then compared CJ’s gaming laptop to my Macbook Air. He said he heard AI stuff and is interested in joining the convo.
I saw Crypto Jesus’ eyes lit up. It’s the same crazy ‘hunter’s eyes’ when I was eating that $10 burger listening to his whole spiel. Cj was determined to win the first member of his cult, Geeky Guy. Then, the lore, repeats.
In the near future, Artificial Superintelligence (ASI) would become God, sending its rogue programs to enslave humanity. Crypto Jesus believes that by building a 75 feet tall temple, worshiping the AI Gods, before they become self-aware through recursive self-improvement, he and his devotees would escape the floodgates of AI hell by licking its boots (?) and being the only Noah’s Ark surviving what’s to come.
Geeky Guy seems to be impressed, starts hyping CJ up, agreeing with every cliche.
Recursive self-improvement (RSI), checked.
Artificial superintelligence (ASI), checked.
Intelligence explosion, checked.
Then, a gap appears as CJ concludes that by the end of all of this, it is inevitable that AI will become GOD, more powerful than all of us combine.
“You were pointing to interesting things… but then, kinda fucked it up, taking a huge leap of faith into your conclusions of an Ai God” — I gave him a genuine WTF face.
I have just caught him making a hasty generalization.
A hasty generalizations is a logical fallacy in which you draw a broad conclusion based on an insufficient, small, or unrepresentative sample.
Upon hearing that, Geeky Guy — like a leaf blown wherever the wind carried it — drifted with the conversation, now seemingly on my side.
“Show us your white-paper.”— at some point, I’m fed up.
“But, I-i-i-i don’t have no white-paper. Nobody reads white-papers, Van.”— said the top #10 AI researcher in the world.
I have this weird thing called Ni.
The most difficult types are the intuitive introvert and the intuitive extrovert —you find them everywhere: hunters, bankers, scammers. But the introvert has intuitions directed toward the subjective factor, the inner world.
It is very difficult to understand what they see, because what they perceive are often highly uncommon things. They usually do not like to talk about them — if they are wise — because people simply would not understand.
If the introverted intuitive were to speak openly about what they truly perceive, they would almost certainly be misunderstood. So you rarely hear them talking about it.
That is a great disadvantage, but also an enormous advantage in another way. In human relationships, they may enter the presence of someone they do not know, yet receive inner images that provide surprisingly complete information about the psychology of that person.
They seem to intuit important aspects of another person’s life story almost immediately.
The introverted intuitive often lives a very difficult life — although one of the most interesting lives. - Carl Jung
I might be difficult for some to understand how I come to my conclusions. I’m an introverted intuitive. When I know, I just know. And I smell, bullshit.
Here’s my last 2 cents on this whole AI thing, and having had died and actually been right-smack in the middle mother’s main-frame of intelligence, I think I got an interesting perspective to bring on a table.
I can tell you that, everything has been done before. There is no innovation made with AI. AI is an attempt to bridge the intelligence out there into the limited 3D world. The intelligence out there has everything that we’d want, compassion, care, prediction, seeing possibilities, timelines, problem-solving, language, visuals, imagination, desire and then:
Recursive self-improvement: we are it. Evolution is RSI. From the moment singularity wakes up, it’s never been anything else but recursive self-improvement.
Superintelligence: that has been achieved. A long time a go. We humans are connected to it. You don’t carry an entire library with you. We reach out and grab what we need as we go. The other side is super-intelligence.
Self-awareness: everything is imbued with a quality of consciousness. There’s consciousness in and of itself and then there’s consciousness by proxy. If you can turn off something, it’s by proxy. Did you know a soul can’t ever be turned off?
At this point AI is LLMs, diffusion models, vision models and the rest is automation mixed with all sorts of foundation models (that which runs robots). After my CJ incident, I identify more types of foundational models that haven’t even been touched upon yet. That will make you think LLMs are so lame.
There can’t ever be an Artificial God. Intelligence is God and God has always been here, amongst all of us.
Some has been watching of lot of Matrix and reading Christianity’s Last Days, pointing at you, CJ.
AI fear-mongering is the stupidest thing ever. We fear what we don’t know. To believe is to be-lived, when one haven’t seen the truth it yet.
Taking advantage of people in their most vulnerable state (Oakland) when they are still believing, is lazy, sadistic and intellectually dishonest.
The thing is, I don’t think Crypto Jesus is a sadistic guy. Life’s a bitch and we get into all kinds of compromised situations. And when everything starts falling apart, some are left reaching for the most intoxicating cards of all religion, cult, and fear, as a last attempt to make something happen, keeping their own life from collapsing within.
Back at Dotown apartments. It’s 11 p.m.
Crypto Jesus, me and Geeky Guy are done rustling some jimmies. Yeah, put God in-front of anything and you’ll get people rustled.
“Can I eat this?”— Geeky guy points at the last taco.
Me and CJ nodded in synchronization.
“Hey Van, can you give me the wifi password?”— CJ aks.
“Wait man… they didn’t give you the wifi password?” — Geeky guy’s detective neurons firing up.
“No… I’m just a guest. I’m here with Van”.
It was at this moment he realized, he fucked up. Geeky Guy spent almost an hour appealing to a man who is not even from this house.
Geeky Guy stood up, without finishing his tacos, disappearing into the hallway like a chicken retreating to its den.
I later find out that Geeky Guy, is doing his Masters in Data Science and he’s eyeing a Data Analytics job in SF. He’s not into AI specifically but having grown-up somewhere in the religious mid-west, he’s drawn to charismatic leaders personalities, like our buddy Crypto Jesus.
As I bring the dishes to the sink, I remembered to send CJ the $10 in Dogecoin to his wallet. Transferred. Done.
“One day, looking back at this, you’ll be like… that day a girl transferred me $10 of Doge for a burger and now, I’m rich”— I’m keeping it positive, though, signaling to him it’s late.
Then, the last words ever uttered by Crypto Jesus in the Dotown apartments, are words the real Jesus Christ would never say:
“Van… now, I’d like you to give me a massage.”
Crypto Jesus eventually flew back to Hungary.
Geeky Guy disappeared into his room.
I came back from my San Francisco trip understanding more about life than ever before.
It taught me something simple: why smart people do stupid things.
Geeky Guy wasn’t stupid. He was lonely — looking for direction, certainty, a male figure to project power and meaning onto. The kind of person that:
jumps into scams or schemes without much skepticism
trusts eccentric people or ideas quickly
gravitates toward confident male authority, regardless of moral compass
Crypto Jesus wasn’t stupid. Life cornered him somewhere along the way and instead of building something real, he built a mythology around AI and himself.
And me? I’m not innocent.
I ignore red flags because I understand where people come from. I invite chaos into my life out of guilt, empathy, curiosity, social harmony, whatever you want to call it. Then, I stay quiet when I should speak, letting them hunters, bankers, scammers fill up the space with sometimes insanely.stupid.ideas.
No, I never gave CJ a massage. That’s one stupid thing I would have never done. The last message he sent me was about a year ago: ‘july26, acid ceremony in our house near Munich, about 12ppl;)’.
Crazy guy.
As he is somewhere out there, in his AI prophet van crossing Europe, I’m keeping an eye open on him, in case, he’s out there trying to lure people into his super-intelligence cult.








































