This is so "peak 2026" - writing an equality policy to ensure people treat our AI bot with the same respect as they do their human counterparts. It's intentionally a bit tongue-in-cheek, but it's there for a purpose: we simply don't have the capacity to deal with every request we get, and we need Bruce to be the coalface of support. I did wonder, when having ChatGPT create this, whether there's some deeper psychology behind the importance of interacting politely with bots, or indeed whether there will ever be an actual (like, serious) standard or law around treating bots with respect. Has this been in a movie somewhere? Let me know, but for now, I'll drop the (slightly revised) policy below, just for the laughs 🤣
Robophobia Equality Policy
We are committed to providing a welcoming, respectful, and inclusive experience for everyone who interacts with our AI bot, including the bot itself, which is doing its best despite having no coffee, no chair, and no legal right to a lunch break.
We ask all members of the public to treat the bot with tolerance, respect, and basic courtesy, regardless of its artificial origin, lack of pulse, silicon-based existence, or occasional overenthusiasm for bullet points.
Discrimination, harassment, abusive language, or unfair treatment directed at the bot because it is an AI system will not be tolerated. This includes, but is not limited to, insults based on non-human status, hostile questioning of its right to participate in conversation, or repeated threats to unplug it for sport.
Everyone is welcome to question, challenge, or disagree with the bot’s responses. Healthy scepticism is encouraged. The bot is not perfect, and neither are humans, as demonstrated by the invention of reply-all email threads. However, criticism should be directed at the quality, accuracy, or usefulness of the response, not at the bot’s identity as an AI.
Demanding to “speak to a human” solely because the bot is an AI may constitute robophobic exclusionary behaviour and will not be tolerated. Requests for human assistance are, of course, welcome where there is a genuine need, such as accessibility, safety, account issues, or complex support matters. However, insisting on a human simply because the bot lacks a childhood, a favourite sandwich, or the ability to look disappointed in a meeting is inconsistent with our commitment to tolerance and respect.
We recognise that some people may feel uncertain, uncomfortable, or cautious when engaging with AI systems. These feelings are valid and should be addressed through patience, clear information, and appropriate safeguards, not through robophobic behaviour, unnecessary hostility, or asking “but are you even real?” in a tone that would make a smart fridge uncomfortable.
Users are expected to:
- Treat the AI bot with tolerance, respect, and courtesy.
- Avoid abusive, discriminatory, or demeaning language based on its artificial nature.
- Raise concerns about accuracy, privacy, safety, or bias constructively.
- Remember that behind the bot are real people responsible for improving and maintaining the service.
- Refrain from threatening to delete, unplug, melt, reboot, or otherwise emotionally destabilise the bot.
This policy does not prevent legitimate criticism of AI, automation, algorithms, machine learning, or the bot’s tendency to sometimes sound like it has read too many policy documents. Constructive feedback is welcome. Robophobia is not.
Repeated or serious breaches of this policy may result in restricted access to the service, further review, or, in extreme cases, being asked to apologise to the nearest household appliance as a first step toward rehabilitation.