JEPAs often regularize one-view embeddings toward an isotropic Gaussian, implicitly baking Euclidean symmetry into the representation. We show that this is not merely a benign default. For a known structured downstream geometry $H\succ0$, the minimax and maximum-entropy covariance under a Hamiltonian energy budget is $(c/d)H^{-1}$, and Euclidean isotropy incurs a closed-form price of isotropy. More importantly, when the downstream geometry is unknown, no geometry-independent fixed marginal target is canonical: every fixed covariance shape can be maximally misaligned for some structured geometry. We further show that even oracle one-view marginals do not identify the JEPA view-to-view predictive coupling. These results suggest that the structural bias in JEPAs should enter the cross-view coupling rather than a fixed encoder marginal. We instantiate this principle with \textbf{HamJEPA}, which encodes each view as a phase-space state $(q,p)$ and predicts view-to-view transitions with a learned Hamiltonian leapfrog map, while non-isotropic scale and spectral floors prevent collapse. In a deliberately headless token protocol, HamJEPA improves over SIGReg on CIFAR-100 by $+4.89$ kNN@20 and $+3.52$ linear-probe points at 30 epochs, and by $+6.45$ kNN@20 and $+10.64$ linear-probe points at 80 epochs, while a matched MLP predictor ablation shows that the symplectic coupling is the ingredient driving the neighborhood-geometry gain. On ImageNet-100, HamJEPA-$q$ improves by $+4.82$ kNN@20 and $+7.52$ linear-probe points at 45 epochs.