It's so easy to fall in love with online dating. It makes it simple to meet prospective partners with the simple swipe of a finger, and has opened up many sex lives to new possibilities. But let's look on the negative side, too. It's also introduced new ways for bad actors to target and hurt us. As the web's premier adult dating site, AdultFriendFinder is unfortunately rife with various scams and scammers, and while it's easy to have a good time on the site, it's also easy to get into trouble if you're not super vigilant about your AFF activity.

Because AFF contains nudity and encourages its members to get frisky — hey, that's kinda the point of the whole site — it's an especially enticing target for malicious users. The worrying thing is that these attacks are on the up, with so-called "romance scams" now outranking all other types of scams in terms of total reported financial losses, according to figures reported by the Federal Trade Commission.

The first step towards staying safe is to first be aware of your vulnerabilities. Here's a rundown of the five most common AdultFriendFinder scams and how to avoid them.

Phishing scams

If you've used the internet before, you've been the target of a phishing scam. That's just a fact. Think of those emails from Google asking you to click a link to reset your password, or the sob stories you get from an unknown email address claiming to be a relative — the ones who just need a little money to out of a fix. These are all examples of phishing attacks, where a bad faith actor pretends to be someone they're not to gain your trust and steal sensitive information for you — or rinse your bank account.

On AdultFriendFinder, bad actors will happily pose as interested singles, casually flirting with you until the moment they decide to ask for money or personal information, or try to get you to visit an off-site link.

Here are the five biggest red flags to help you identify a phishing attack:

• Someone rushes to get you to another off-site destination, which could be a website or a different chat platform like WhatsApp or Telegram.

• They attempt to create a sense of urgency or emergency, often with a sad personal story.

• They randomly request specific personal information about you, whether that's your date of birth or your home address.

• Their profile and/or behavior is "too good to be true," with professional-quality photos and an instantly flirtatious conversation style to win you over.

• They dodge or deny requests to meet in person or verify each other's identities through a video call, and therefore you've never actually seen them.

Identity theft

Unfortunately, between generative AI and the ease with which people can access our personal data, identity theft is now easier than it's ever been. 

On AdultFriendFinder, identity theft scams can work one of two ways: Either the bad actors operate with patience to steal your identity, gradually building a workable profile of you based on your personal details — name, age, location and employment history, and more — as well as the photos and videos they harvest from your profile, or they steal another person's identity to execute a more sophisticated phishing scam on you. 

Your first and best defence against identity theft scams is to strictly limit the amount of personal information you share on your public profile. It's a good idea to give the minimum necessary identifiable details about yourself; so, for example, you can share your first name but should not share your last name or even your initials, and you can mention that you're a lawyer or a doctor but should not share the name of the law firm or hospital that employs you. They can cleverly narrow down the specifics.

Follow these rules closely even in one-on-one conversations. And never assume that the person you're talking to is who they say they are until you have verified that yourself, and strictly ration what information you give out about yourself. 

Bots and self-promoters

The bots and self-promoters are simultaneously the most common scam on AdultFriendFinder and the most harmless. Because it's easy to create profiles on the site, webcam models, some OnlyFans creators and other sex workers use the site to promote their pages, usually via chat bots. These scams aren't particularly sophisticated: The person uses their real photos in their profile but engages AI to actually talk to other users, usually to send them to an outside link like an Instagram, OnlyFans or Telegram channel related to their business, and while they're typically harmless, they're also a major waste of your time. Just in case you're tempted to check their links, remember to do your due diligence before clicking on the link, as it's easy to hide malicious links inside shortened URLs. 

These self-promoting accounts are also typically easy to spot. Their photos are typically very airbrushed and professionally shot and staged, and their conversation rarely goes far beyond "hello" before they start plugging their side hustle. You're better off just ignoring these profiles entirely, but if you do take a shot on speaking to one, definitely end the engagement once they start sharing off-site links with you. 

Pay-to-play scams

There are plenty of legitimate online businesses that would be happy to exchange your money for kinky chats, webcam shows, or custom photos and videos, but be wary of anyone offering those services on AdultFriendFinder.

Even if you're willing to buy sexual content or tip a webcam model, AFF was not designed to be a sex work platform, and all of the buyer protections that exist on sites like OnlyFans or Chaturbate are absent from AdultFriendFinder, which means if the model or sex worker wants to take your money and run, you'll have no recourse to protect yourself. 

Blackmail aka "sextortion"

The worst, most pernicious and potentially most damaging scams run on AdultFriendFinder relate to blackmail, or what is colloquially known as "sextortion." This is possible because the site encourages nudity and other forms of sexually explicit content. This also leaves users vulnerable to blackmail attempts. For instance, are you using the site without your spouse's knowledge or consent? And how would your employer or your customers react if your private photos and videos were leaked? 

Bad actors know full well the damage this kind of thing can do to your reputation, your marriage or professional life, and they will seek to use any possible leverage to use this to blackmail you. 

Does this mean you can't use AdultFriendFinder or shouldn't engage in some of the more risqué activities it offers? Of course not! But we do encourage you to use it responsibly and maintain a constant awareness of what you're sharing and with whom you're sharing it. And don't forget: If you do experience any sort of sextortion, you should know that it's a crime and should be reported to law enforcement.