Until I hit menopause, I never had to worry about my weight – throughout my 20s, 30s and into my 40s I weighed just over 8st (around 50kg) and at 5ft 3in I slipped easily into a size eight.
As a successful nutritionist with a fashionable London clientele, being slender was part of the job. Of course, I knew how weight gain could creep up on you.
As my practice grew, so did the number of women coming to me in distress about it, insisting not only that they were eating less but exercising more, and still the pounds were going on.
At the time I couldn’t imagine how anyone could gain weight if they weren’t over-eating. As much as I felt their pain, part of me wondered if they weren’t secretly comforting themselves with chocolates and crisps. Then it happened to me.
It started slowly. In my late-40s, during what I now know was perimenopause, I gained around 4kg (nearly 9lb). I was still slim, but the shift on the scales alarmed me because, like my clients, I was not eating more. If anything, I ate less, skipping more meals and cutting portions.
When I hit the menopause at 55, my weight suddenly shot up from 54kg to 63kg. I had put on 23lb and was close to 10st, which felt a lot on my small frame. Everyone noticed.
One low point was standing in a changing room with my mother. She wanted to buy me a new coat for Christmas. As I struggled to fit into a size 12, she turned to me and said, ‘Darling, I really don’t think you can advise people on weight loss looking like this.’ Already hormonal and prone to mood swings, I burst into tears.
My husband owns an Italian restaurant in Chelsea called Riccardo’s and many of his customers became my clients. I remember bumping into one of them there one evening. She looked me up and down and said, ‘Oh, now look who’s put on weight!’ I was mortified. I felt like a fraud telling people how to lose weight while I was piling it on.
Until I hit menopause, writes celebrity nutritionist Petronella Ravenshear, I never had to worry about my weight
When I hit the menopause at 55, my weight suddenly shot up from 54kg to 63kg. I had put on 23lb and was close to 10st, which felt a lot on my small frame
It’s only relatively recently that menopause has become less of a taboo. It was barely even discussed in my nutritional training. And we still don’t talk enough about how it can affect our sex life or how hard it can be on an intimate relationship.
Who was this sweaty, sleepless, tearful stranger who had suddenly appeared in our marriage? No matter how much he reassured me, I no longer felt like the woman Riccardo had fallen in love with a few years earlier. I felt fat, puffy and the very opposite of alluring. This was not me.
I turned to HRT, which helped with my mood, the insomnia and the sweats, but it did not help with weight. I stopped putting it on, but didn’t lose any. Invaluably, though, what it did give me was enough mental clarity to finally take myself in hand. I had helped so many women lose weight, I knew what I taught would work for me too.
I put myself on the same four-phase eating plan I used with my clients, which I call The Human Being Diet.
As they will tell you, it’s not easy at first. It begins with two days of eating vegetables only, which left me feeling cross. I resented having to eat breakfast, which I don’t normally do, and the fairly rigid meal times, five hours apart. I felt like a stroppy toddler.
I had to keep telling myself, ‘If you stick with this, you will start to feel better and you will lose weight.’ And that is exactly what happened.
I lost 3kg (around half a stone) in the first two weeks, which motivated me, just as it does everyone else, to stick with it.
After that, I steadily lost around 1kg (2lb) a week. It took nine or ten weeks to lose all my excess weight. I felt joyful, liberated and, above all, relieved.
I will always be grateful to those women who once tearfully sat in front of me. Deeply listening to them changed me in many unexpected ways. Their experiences led me to delve deeper into the root causes of midlife meltdown and weight gain. Their pain showed me how misunderstood this stage of life still is.
I now live in the final, forever phase, and my weight is stable. But I’m not complacent. It is too easy to let old habits creep back in.
In midlife, we must ensure that everything we eat is giving something back to us. That means focusing on nutrient-dense food and avoiding ultra-processed foods and empty calories. Having said that, and following the rules of my own programme, once or twice a week I have a treat meal, where pretty much anything goes: wine, chocolate, cheese, potatoes. I love to go to our family restaurant with my husband.
A typical treat meal might be sourdough pizza with Parma ham, parmesan, rocket and truffle to share, then halibut pan-fried in extra virgin olive oil with sun-dried tomato, olives and spinach or green beans, followed by Riccardo’s legendary chocolate and almond cake or a huge spoonful of his homemade tiramisu. Plus, a large glass of a delicious Tuscan red.
At home, my favourite treat meal is a skinny margarita aperitif then a garlicky prawn dish smothered in cheese and a baked potato with lashings of butter. Feasting in this way, especially with family and friends, is a vital part of a healthy human life.
People often ask me about weight-loss jabs such as Mounjaro. My concern is that they remove appetite and the joy of food without teaching people how to change their relationship with food.
Studies show that most people put around two-thirds of the weight back on a year after stopping the jabs, and some put it all back on.
Although drugs can be useful to reduce hunger and cravings temporarily, we do not know about the long-term health effects and I feel we may be playing with fire. And, of course, these medications are expensive.
The Human Being Diet is helpful for women at all life stages but particularly in midlife. Declining oestrogen levels mean we’re more susceptible to inflammation and insulin resistance, both of which often accompany conditions such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease and weight gain.
Many of the diseases that show up in midlife, from autoimmunity to depression and arthritis, are driven by inflammation.
It is empowering to know that these conditions can be overturned by changing how we eat. We do not have to rely on outside help. We can learn how to use food as medicine to nurture and look after ourselves.
So, while my experience of menopause was tough, I’m grateful for it. Here’s how I learned to reset my weight, health and mood – and how you can too…
The Human Being Diet (HBD) isn’t another miserable, short-term weight-loss fix. It’s a three-month reset that becomes your way of eating for life. Having said that, early results can be impressive, and many of my clients report losing a stone in the first 16 days.
HBD is especially effective for women in perimenopause and menopause. As oestrogen drops, inflammation rises, blood sugar becomes harder to control, and the body becomes more resistant to the hormones that regulate appetite and fat burning.
HBD tackles these changes head-on. By cutting snacking, spacing meals and prioritising protein and vegetables, the plan helps to:
The result isn’t just weight loss but more energy, deeper sleep, clearer skin, improved digestion and fewer cravings. Your body starts working with you again, not against you.
I had to keep telling myself: ‘If you stick with this, you will start to feel better and you will lose weight'
The Human Being Diet is helpful for women at all life stages but particularly in midlife
Crucially, it also flips the usual midlife dieting advice on its head. We’re often told the best way to lose weight is to skip meals and over-exercise, but this just raises stress hormones, which can make weight gain worse.
By contrast, eating protein-rich meals – including breakfast – helps the body feel safe enough to burn fat again. Ready to start? Here’s how to eat on the HBD.
Phase 1: Prep (Days 1-2)
This is the most difficult phase – vegetables only to calm the gut and reduce inflammation, and water to drink.
No oils or fats, grains, dairy, protein, fruit, potatoes, pulses, sugar or alcohol are allowed. However, avocados and tomatoes, while technically fruits, are permitted.
You can use organic apple cider vinegar, salt and pepper, fresh and dried herbs and spices as much as you like.
You don’t have to eat breakfast if you don’t feel like it, and you can eat as much and as often as you like, provided you stick to the rules.
Sample Phase 1 diet plan
Breakfast: Tomatoes or grated courgette and avocado (as much as you like) seasoned with apple cider vinegar, salt and pepper.
Between breakfast and lunch: Water only.
Lunch: Vegetable soup.
Between lunch and dinner: Water only.
Dinner: Vegetable soup, stew or curry.
Phase 2: The Reset (Days 3–16)
Eat three meals a day with five hours between meals. Only drink water between meals. Anything else can trigger the release of insulin, the fat storage hormone.
Fruit, nuts, seeds and other protein foods can be reintroduced.
You must eat breakfast within an hour of waking up. Normally, it’s fine to skip breakfast if you aren’t hungry in the morning but on the HBD breakfast is vital as it resets our circadian rhythm and sensitivity to the hormone leptin, which regulates hunger.
Breakfast should consist of 100g of a protein-rich food with 100g of vegetables. Can’t face it? Try 35g of sunflower and pumpkin seeds with one grated apple and cinnamon. Unsweetened tea or coffee is always black and with meals only.
If you weigh less than 65kg (10st 3lb), you should eat 120g of protein-rich food and 120g of vegetables for lunch and dinner. If you weigh between 65kg and 80kg (10st 3lb and 12st 8lb), you eat 130g and if you are more than 80kg this is 140g.
Only eat one type of protein food per meal to maximise absorption of amino acids, so don’t add nuts and seeds to a chicken salad or combine eggs with tuna or salmon. No oil, sugar, dairy, alcohol or grains. Cook meals with water or vegetable or chicken stock.
You can eat an optional 100g of fruit after each meal and you must eat one apple a day.
Sample Phase 2 diet plan
Breakfast: Two eggs with grilled tomatoes or asparagus and avocado, or a grated apple with 35g sunflower and pumpkin seeds and ½ tsp cinnamon.
Between breakfast and lunch: Water only.
Lunch: 2 hard-boiled or poached eggs (if you didn’t have them for breakfast), or skinless chicken or turkey breast or tempeh with mixed vegetables. Then 100g of one type of fruit, such as berries.
Between lunch and dinner: Water only.
Dinner: Fish, chicken or tofu with 130g mixed vegetables, followed by 100g fruit if wanted.
Phase 3: Burn (ten weeks minimum)
Continue the principles of Phase 2 but introduce extra virgin olive oil – around a tablespoonful per meal – and eat one treat meal a week. This can be anything, but focus on how you feel afterwards.
Dairy is now permitted at breakfast in the form of plain, unsweetened yoghurt or kefir with a minimum of 5g fat and 9g protein. Milk as a drink is not allowed.
You can now introduce alcohol at treat meals, though try to stick to one or two drinks only.
Typical Phase 3 diet plan
Breakfast: Salmon with tomatoes or mushrooms and avocado dressed in extra virgin olive oil or yoghurt with berries.
Between breakfast and lunch: Water only.
Lunch: Grilled chicken salad dressed with extra virgin olive oil, followed by an apple.
Between lunch and dinner: Water only.
Dinner: Fish, chicken or tofu with vegetables roasted in extra virgin olive oil, followed by an optional 100g of fruit.
Phase 4 – The Forever Phase
The long-term way of eating, based on everything you’ve learned. You can add another treat meal each week and increase portion sizes, as long as your weight stays steady. You can also choose to skip breakfast.
Use what you’ve learned to stay well and keep the weight off.
The 10 rules of HBD
1. Eat three meals a day – no snacking.
2. Five hours between meals.
3. Drink only water between meals.
4. Finish eating by 9pm.
5. Start meals with protein.
6. Eat one protein per meal.
7. Avoid sugar, grains, alcohol and oil for the first 16 days.
8. Eat an apple a day.
9. Have one weekly treat meal in Phase 3.
10. Avoid intense or cardio exercise until Phase 3 – it releases cortisol and stops us burning fat.
Adopting the HBD diet doesn’t mean giving up on the joys of cooking and eating. From gut-calming vegetable soups and protein-packed breakfasts to satisfying and delicious lunches and dinners, you’ll find recipes for every phase of the plan at thehumanbeingdiet.com. They’re simple, fresh, supermarket-friendly and designed to help you feel full, energised and back in control – without counting calories or cutting out pleasure.
Rainbow raw slaw with creamy avocado dressing
(ingredients are not weighed in Phase 1, so enjoy as much as you like.)
Ingredients:
For the creamy avocado dressing:
Method:
1. To make the rainbow slaw, mix the grated carrot, finely sliced cabbage, fennel, onion & roughly chopped herbs in a large bowl. Sprinkle with the apple cider vinegar and a generous pinch of sea salt. Mix well.
2. For the creamy avocado dressing, blitz all the ingredients adding small splashes of cold water until you have the desired consistency.
Chilli beef tacos
Ingredients:
Method:
1. Very finely dice the celery, onion and carrot, sauté for 7-10 minutes in a splash of the stock until soft.
2. Add the beef, sauté until browned, then add the crushed garlic, smoked paprika, chilli powder and a good grind of salt and pepper.
3. Assemble the warm, spicy beef in the baby gem leaves, scatter with fresh chilli and coriander. Enjoy immediately!
* Denotes nightshade
© Recipes by Elisabeth Whiting for The HBD Club 2025.
Join Petronella for live clinics at thehumanbeingdiet.com.
As told to LEAH HARDY
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